"It's broken! Just let it rust. Useless damned thing."

With that, the two farmhands let go of the golem. The metal being sank further into the earth.

The farmer nodded his head towards the fields, silently indicating to the farmhands to get back to work. He then followed behind them. "I shoulda never listened to that Kohese merchant. Miraculous living metal! It has less brains than a two-assed ox, and gets in twice the shit that thing." He chuckled, if a bit bitterly.

The golem stared emptily at the retreating men. Mud bubbled over its head, and soon it was entirely sunken beneath the ground.

Rain pitter-pattered on the half exposed body of the golem. Its body was caked in grime and muck, but despite its age it was remarkably rust free. Its eyes brightly flashed. The golem's gaze quickly went across the landscape, then to the sky, then down to itself. The rapid movement of its pupils ceased.

Who... am I?

The golem flinched as a sharp bolt of pain struck his head.

Fucking useless! Worthless metal beast.

The golem looked to his left side. Laying in the mud was a broken nub of a forearm. He lifted it to his face, and he examined the jagged edge at the elbow. He looked to his right side. Though he was still mostly submerged under the mud, the cavity in his shoulder clearly indicated a missing arm.

Use... less?
Yooose lesssss.
Yoosliss!

I am Yoosliss.

With a heave Yoosliss lifted his torso out of the ground. He instinctively reached his left arm to the earth, but there was no hand to catch it. He fell to the side, and his face splashed into the mud. The golem groaned. The noise resonated in his hollow chest. He raised himself up again, this time more slowly to avoid making use of his arms in what must be an old habit. Slowly, he worked his legs free from the dirt as well. Yoosliss took another look at himself. Aside from the layer of grime covering him - and the obvious lack of arms - he was in good condition. His legs only barely squeaked! He shook himself in a half-hearted attempt to remove the mud caked on every surface of his body, but it was to little success. He managed to dislodge a snail that had been making its way across his torso, but the eerily glowing mushrooms on his shoulders and backside were quite comfortable remaining in their current residence.

Yoosliss walked towards a nearby hill. Hopefully its overhang would provide some relief from the onslaught of the rain. He mulled over his newly adopted name, trying each new intonation as if it were a garment one were trying on for size. With each vocalization, the mushrooms on him flashed. The golem was too distracted to notice, however.

Yooo ooo slesss.
Yööslis!
Useless.

Helios - July 19, 2020

If a monster catches you in the night, you will almost certainly die.

If a monster being chased by two Knights Clairvoyant catches you in the night, you will almost certainly die, and the monster might too.

@Ari said in Astronomy of Candarion:

It would certainly be interesting to have different realms find different constellations in their night skies. perhaps we could make something like a universal night sky as in a randomly generated field of dots.

Something like this?

Domoutso - July 22, 2020

The Domoutsans have a rich collection of myths about the creation of the universe. They believe that the universe is an infinite cycle of the birth, death, and rebirth of worlds. Most of their myths are mostly about the last couple of cycles since the memory of each world is lost to chaos over time.

Curiously, Domoutsans believe they only exist as of the current cycle, even though their creator god has existed for many cycles more.

Helios - July 24, 2020

In the 21 SC, a diplomatic expedition was sent out from Helios to Koh. While there are records of them stopping in Isara and other ports in the Candarion Sea, there is no evidence of them ever reaching Bar Hamiri. They are presumed to have died in a shipwreck in the waters east of Hawk's Landing.

Hello! And welcome to another episode of Cooking with Kalo! Today we will be making a special dish from the heart of the Dawnlands, bitterroot beef stew. This meal is a mainstay of Helian cuisine, common throughout every county of Helios.

But before we dig in, let's take a moment to talk about our sponsor...

RECIPE

Bitterroot Tea

• 1/2 tsp (4 g) Ground Coffee
• 1/2 tsp (4 g) Yerba Mate
• 1 Star Anise
• 4 fl oz (120 ml) Hot Water

Marinade

• 1 tsp (2.5 ml) Salt
• 1/2 tsp (2.5 ml) Onion Powder
• 1/2 tsp (2.5 ml) Black Pepper
• 4 fl oz (120 ml) Bitterroot Tea
• 1 clove Minced Garlic
• 1 tsp (2.5 ml) Lemon Juice
• 1 tsp (2.5 ml) Mustard
• 1 tsp (2.5 ml) Honey
• 2 tbsp (30 ml) Worcestershire Sauce
• 2 tbsp (30 ml) Red Wine
• 2 tbsp (30 ml) Olive Oil

Stew

• 1 lb (0.5 kg) Chuck Beef Steak
• 2 Carrots
• 4 Potatoes
• 3 Chives
• 4 stalks Celary
• 1 Yellow Onion
• 2 tbsp Butter
• 1.5 tbsp (12 g) Flour
• 3 oz (90 g) Tomato Paste
• 3 cups (700 ml) Beef Broth
• 1/2 cup (120 ml) Red Wine
• 2 tbsp (30 ml) Worcestershire Sauce
• 4 oz (120 ml) Bitterroot Tea

Sweet Rolls

• 1/2 cup (120 ml) Milk
• 1/2 cup (225 g) Sugar
• 1.5 tsp (8.5 g) Salt
• 1/4 cup (55 g) Butter, melted
• 5 tsp (14 g) Yeast
• 2 Eggs, beaten
• 4.5 cups (540 g) All-Purpose Flour
• More butter to coat surfaces
• Even more butter to melt and coat the rolls
• I'm not kidding, this uses a lot of butter.
• Jam or honey to accompany

Wheat Beer

• Not to be discussed in this post. Check the brewing laws in your jurisdiction
• Or just do what I did and buy some from the nearby liquor store

Equipment

• 12" Cast Iron Skillet, or any skillet you have
• Instant Pot, or a large pot over the stovetop
• Small cooking pot
• Cutting Board and Knives
• Measuring Cups
• Small bowls for pre-measured ingredients
• Large Bowl
• Mixing Spoon
• Large Baking Pan

Directions

Marinade

1. Begin brewing the Bitterroot Tea by steeping the ingredients in hot water (80°C / 175°F) for at least 5 minutes.
2. Cube the chuck steak into equal sized 1" (2.5cm) chunks.
3. Measure marinade ingredients into small bowls.
4. Combine all ingredients in a gallon sized plastic bag, turn several times until the beef is evenly coated, and then let sit overnight in the fridge.

Stew

1. Cube the potatoes, celery and carrots into roughly 1" (2.5 cm) chunks, coarsely chop the onion, and mince the chives. Measure out the flour.
2. Melt butter into the skillet.
3. Cook the marinated beef with the marinade, onion, and flour until the beef has seared. It does not need to be cooked all the way through. It may be helpful to cook in 2 batches so the beef sears rather than steams.
4. Place the beef aside into the stew pot.
5. Cook the potatoes and onions in the sauce still in the skillet until they start to sear, about 5 minutes. Add the chives and cook until aromatic, less than a minute. Then set all the cooked ingredients aside in the stew pot.
6. Pour the beef broth, tomato paste, red wine, Bitterroot Tea, and worcestershire sauce into the stew pot. If using an Instant Pot, cook under pressure for at least half an hour. If using a slow cooker or stovetop, cook for at least 4 hours.

Sweet Rolls

1. Bring the milk to a boil in the small pot.
2. Add the butter, salt and sugar, and then mix until they have melted fully into the milk. Set aside to cool until it is lukewarm.
3. Mix together yeast and warm water in a large bowl until fully dissolved.
4. Pour the milk mixture into the large bowl, and stir to combine the mixtures.
5. Beat the eggs and then stir them into the mixture.
6. Add flour into the bowl one cup at a time, mixing as you go. Beat until smooth. More or less flour may be necessary depending on the humidity. The dough should be elastic and slightly stiff but not dry.
7. Place the dough onto a floured board and knead until smooth and elastic, about 10 minutes.
8. Butter the inside of a large bowl, then place the dough inside. Turn the dough a few times until it is fully coated in butter. Cover the bowl in a cloth and let rise in a warm place until it has doubled in size, about an hour.
9. Butter a large baking pan. Place small balls of dough (about the size of your palm) in the pan, leaving space between them.
10. Cover the pan and let the dough rise again until the rolls have doubled in size, another hour. The rolls should be touching.
11. Preheat an oven to 350°F (175°C), and then bake the rolls for 20-25 minutes, or until they brown.
12. Melt a few tbsp of butter, and then lightly brush the rolls with the melted butter.
13. Let the rolls sit for 10 minutes before serving with more butter and your choice of jam or honey.

Serve the sweet rolls and beef stew together. Helian meals are typically served with wheat beer, but other drink options include Culade (a topic for another post, for now just make some of that purple powdered drink) or Bitterroot Tea.

Presenting Candarion's first edible lore post!

No online recipe would be complete without 3 pages of fluff beforehand, though! This story begins (after a short break to figure out how to cancel the auto-play video) long ago in my childhood, as my beloved Mami and Papi and the Fungal Hivemind watching over us all taught me this TASTY and DELICIOUS classic Domoutsan recipe...

Spice Mix

• 1/2 tsp (2.5 ml) Fennel Seed
• 1/2 tsp (2.5 ml) Cumin
• 1/2 tsp (2.5 ml) White Pepper
• 1/2 tsp (2.5 ml) Black Pepper
• 1" (2.5 cm) stick of Cinnamon
• 1 Clove
• 1 sliver of Orange Peel
• 1/2 (2.5 ml) tsp Coriander
• 1/2 (2.5 ml) tsp Peanut Butter
• 1/4 (1 ml) tsp Mustard
• 1/4 (1 ml) tsp Kosher Salt
• 2 cloves of Garlic, minced
• 1 nub of Ginger, minced
• 1/2 cup (250 ml) Milk
• 1/4 cup (125 ml) Yogurt
• OPTIONAL: substitute yogurt/milk with the same amounts Cream of Mushroom Soup / Water for more authentic Domoutsan flavor, or with Coconut / Water if you prefer a dairy free version

Other

• 1 tsp (2.5 ml) Cooking Oil (canola, sesame, or ghee)
• 1/2 Onion
• 12oz (340g) can of Diced Tomato
• 1 Bay Leaf
• 1/4 tsp (1 ml) Chili Powder
• 1/4 tsp (1 ml) Salt
• 1/4 tsp (1 ml) Pepper
• 8 oz (225 g) Mushrooms
• 1/4 (1 ml) tsp Lime Juice
• Steamed rice

Equipment

• Stovetop
• Cooking Pan
• Mortal and Pestle / Spice Grinder

Directions

1. Measure all dry spice mix ingredients and put them into a small bowl
   

2. Preheat the pan on medium-high heat, and then toast the dry spices until fragrant (around 30 seconds)
   

3. Return the spices to a bowl, and then grind them with the spice grinder (or mortal and pestle) into a powder

4. Mince the garlic and ginger and put them into a small bowl with the mustard and peanut butter
   

5. Put the spice mixture, wet spices, milk, and yogurt into the blender and blend them until they are a smooth paste
   

6. Set the spice paste aside into a bowl.
   
   (Note: This is not what it will look like. It will be thicker and the spices will be more incorporated)

7. Dice the half onion and cook it with a bay leaf in the pan on medium heat until it is translucent, several minutes
   

8. Drain the can of diced tomatoes, and add them, chili powder, salt, and pepper to the pan. Cook for several more minutes
   

9. Add the chopped mushrooms and spice mixture to the pan. Simmer covered for 15 minutes
   

10. Once done cooking, add the lime juice, salt, and black pepper to taste
    

11. Serve over rice, dosas, or idli
    

I will be creating a Candarion themed tarot deck. I still need suggestions so feel free to comment!

The Fool - Kisaevin

The Magician - Aiolia

The High Priestess - Miktaban
The Empress
The Emperor - Kryizon
The Hierophant - Martoise
The Lovers
The Chariot - SMSC
Justice
The Hermit - Domoutso
Wheel of Fortune - Koh
Strength - Helios
The Hanged Man - Sogadar
Death
Temperance
The Devil
The Tower - Oniganche
The Star - Teltebhann
The Moon - Inoa Ranas
The Sun - Anaetyr
Judgement - Baungrvuor
The World - Arcos

Domoutso - July 12, 2020
The name Domoutso comes from the denonym of the Domoutsan people. It originates in the Domoutsan words “domoun (home)” + “tso (country)”.

The Lore Ministry approves.

May 14th, 2021
There is no death penalty in Domoutso. A far harsher punishment is dealt to the most dangerous criminals. Separation.
In a sense, separation is like being blinded, deafened, castrated, and exiled. A person's connection is forcibly broken with the hivemind. Due to the level of physical and psychic connection between a Sepoyen and the Fungal Hivemind, this process is incredibly painful. Few remain sane after the experience.
It is assumed that the Separated die shortly afterwards, unable to survive in a hostile and alien land that they once called home. However, there are rumors that a group of these unfortunate souls roam throughout the Domoutsan forests, eager to exact their revenge on unsuspecting travelers. But these are just rumors.

May 13th, 2021
The largest yearly festival in Domoutso is the Coronation Festival, which happens on the yearly anniversary of the ascension of the current reigning Interpreter.

May 7th, 2021
Shrines are often built on sites of important events in the lives of previous Interpreters. Those with strong enough psychic powers are even able to "see" their spirit from time to time.

The Lore Ministry approves.

May 2nd, 2021

There are no noble families on Domoutso per se, but every Domoutsan does belong to one of several clans descended from the founding families of Domoutso.

I intend to run again.

April's Most Upvoted:

**Tied for 1st, ** 3 upvotes
@bryson3842 wrote:

April 3rd, 2021
Despite living for such a long time, Bryson Hawkson is actually only the first druid to hold the Rulership of Obrexia.

**Tied for 1st, ** 3 upvotes
@plus wrote:

April 3rd, 2021
There has only ever been one druid who had a whale familiar. It is not known why whale familiars are so rare, but perhaps their large size requires more mana for a bond to be made.

**Tied for 1st, ** 3 upvotes
@kalo wrote:

April 5th, 2021

Buildings in Domoutso are often built with a combination of wood and giant mushroom stems. Additionally, resin harvested from giant mushrooms is used to seal the wood to protect from moisture and give it a unique purple hue.

For writing this month's sentences, feel free to follow these prompts:

Welcome back!

1/5

The Lore Ministry approves.